The holidays can be a lot of fun. But for many, stress spikes during this season. A recent American Psychiatric Association poll found that 41 percent of Americans say they feel more holiday stress than last year. Four CHD mental health professionals recently discussed the challenges of what is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year (but isn’t always so merry and bright for everyone) and what can be done to navigate the holidays mindfully.

Katelyn Prendergast, senior program director, southern region, outpatient behavioral health services at CHD, said that in addition to the magic and cheer of the holiday season, there is also a lot of pressure for people to overextend themselves.

“There are holiday decorations out in stores before Halloween is even over, and without fail each year the holiday season is upon us before many are ready for it,” she said. “The anxiety and stress come right in tow as soon as those early reminders show up,” she added. “An increase in spending, the desire to have more, or simply not having enough can all exacerbate symptoms of mental health conditions during the holiday season. Traveling certainly can be more hectic at this time, as well as more expensive, making seeing loved ones that much more difficult.”

Indeed, Kristin Abdow, program director of CHD’s Outpatient Behavioral Health Clinic on Pine Street in Springfield, said she and her colleagues consistently hear from clients that their anxiety and stress increase around the holidays, and while the reasons vary from person to person, there are common issues that tend to surface year after year. “Family-related stressors tend to be one of the bigger themes that is amplified during the holiday season,” she said. “The holidays often bring people together in ways that can resurface unresolved family dynamics, grief, or strained relationships. For some, this leads to anticipatory anxiety weeks before the holidays even begin.”

While many people experience stress during the holidays, this is especially true for older individuals who live alone, have no family or no family nearby. In fact, some dread this time of year, according to Debra Call, clinical supervisor of CHD’s Park Street Outpatient Behavioral Health Clinic in West Springfield. “Distress is amplified with themes of family and picture-perfect happiness,” she said. “It is a time when the loneliness can be greatest and is compounded by limited transportation, money, and physical mobility.” She pointed out that the same problems can play out for youth in residential and foster care placements. “This time of year can heighten feelings related to loss, separation, and traumatic experiences,” she said. “These youth can feel different from peers with intact families. Their sense of permanency is again challenged. For many of them, there is higher emotional dysregulation and behavioral acting out.”

Physical Symptoms of Stress

Holiday stress manifests itself not only mentally and emotionally, but also physically in ways similar to regular stress, including muscular pain, skin problems, and high blood pressure. “The most common physical symptom that I’ve noticed for many is fatigue,” said Mary Loomis, program director of CHD’s Easthampton Outpatient Behavioral Health Clinic. “Holiday stress—paired with the colder weather keeping folks indoors more often, and the decreased sunlight—can be a doozy,” she said. “Other more physical symptoms can be headaches, various GI issues, and some people will sometimes even develop cold or flu symptoms—not as a direct manifestation from the stress itself, but from ignoring burnout symptoms and overexerting ourselves.”

To be sure, a less healthy diet can compound holiday stress because the treats that we see more frequently this time of year taste delicious but can send some confusing signals to our bodies if we’re overindulging, according to Loomis. “We feel great during a sugar high, but the crash afterwards is not enjoyable,” she said. “Additionally, if someone is already focusing on eating healthy foods—or working on portion control—the holidays we celebrate can be a challenge. We see it in the media, and many folks experience this at home as well—these big meals when we’re getting together with family and friends that are vastly different from our regular eating habits. We also tend to celebrate with sweet or savory treats that are not a regular part of our diet. My biggest suggestion is to allow yourself to indulge—in moderation. Put things on your plate that you enjoy, but limit yourself to one serving and don’t go back for seconds. Eat slowly and pay attention to your body signals that you’re full. And most importantly don’t do it every day. If you’re going to a dinner party, make sure your lunch and breakfast have well-balanced healthy foods, and avoid snacking during the day. Allow yourself to enjoy these special moments and maintain your normal healthy habits during the more monotonous moments.”

Excessive alcohol use during this time of year can also factor into holiday stress. While alcohol may temporarily reduce stress with feelings of relaxation, it is a poor remedy because it can ultimately worsen anxiety, depression, and sleep problems—and obviously it can be addictive. “Alcohol has an increased presence due to gatherings and celebrations, especially with holidays back-to-back at this time of year,” said Abdow. Drinking can impact many areas of a person’s life, which in turn, affects their mental health, causing harmful medication interactions, lowering inhibitions, and increasing risk-taking. “This can result in mental health being in jeopardy during an already high-stress time of the year,” she said.

Strategies for Self-Care

How can one lessen holiday stress and experience a joyful, more relaxed season? Self-care is essential year-round, but especially during the holidays, according to Loomis. “Give yourself permission to prioritize your needs,” she said. “The people who care about you would rather have you taking care of yourself if you need it than having perfectly wrapped presents and homemade food.”

Abdow said it’s important to normalize emotions this time of year, and she encourages clients to set realistic expectations for themselves to make the season feel more manageable. She added that creating boundaries is key. “If family dynamics are stressful, plan ahead— decide which gatherings feel supportive, decide where limits are needed, and how long you want to stay at family gatherings,” she said. “Sometimes identifying a coping strategy—like stepping outside or in another room for a break or having a supportive person to reach out to—can make the experience more manageable.”

Prendergast agreed that holiday family drama can make gatherings tense and awkward. “There can be pressure to make everyone happy and to meet the expectations of all family members,” she said. “Also common are disagreements over where to spend time or how to be in several places at once, and so on. It is common to get lost in the preparation and planning, before you even get to the experience. My advice would be to choose what is best for you and your mental health and base your decisions on that. Choose yourself over what the group wants, or excuse yourself from a celebration because you know it will be upsetting to you. Be the owner of what the holiday season means to you.”

When is the right time to see a professional if someone is finding the holidays difficult to deal with? Prendergast said that anytime is the “right” time. If someone is feeling distressed during the holidays, there is no reason to wait—chances are there are underlying reasons contributing to the difficulties they are experiencing. “The sooner they seek help, the sooner they will be working toward resolution,” she said. “Everyone deserves to feel peace, especially during what is meant to be a joyful time. But more important than that, seeking help can provide support, access to resources, and at the very least serve as a reminder that someone cares.”

Abdow pointed out that seeking professional support is important when stress, anxiety, or low mood begin interfering with daily functioning (sleep, concentration, relationships, or keeping up with responsibilities), or when typical coping strategies aren’t helping as much they normally do. “Reliance on alcohol or other substances, increasing family conflict, or feeling emotionally overwhelmed are also important indicators,” she said. “The holidays can amplify existing challenges like anxiety, depression, trauma histories, grief, or financial stress, and connecting with a therapist can prevent the temporary stress from fueling a crisis.”

It’s important to acknowledge that the holidays can bring challenges, but any thoughts or actions of self-harm require immediate professional attention. The suicide hotline number is 988 or 1-800-273-8255. To find mental health support at CHD, contact Central Access for therapy services 1-844-243-4357 (1-844-CHD-HELP). For mental health emergencies, contact CHD Crisis Services at 1-833-243-8255.